In life, there’s a season for everything, including motherhood. Just like winter transitions to spring, moms transition from diapers and bottles to lunchboxes and little league, to learners’ permits and prom dates. There’s beauty and struggle in each season, and whether you’re looking fondly backward or eagerly forward, we’re here for all of it!
I’m Rebekah, I’m just exiting the baby stage of motherhood, and I LOVE THE BABY YEARS!
There is no drug more powerful than a newborn baby. Their smell, their sounds, their movements, the way they fold so helplessly into your arms. Their tiny feet and toes. They are pure magic.
Babies remind you to return to the basics of life. Sleep, nourishment, physical care. Babies remind you of how your presence and your love is really all that children need. To feel safe, secure, and cared for.
I’m making my way out of the baby years yet again as my third baby heads fast and furious into the second half of his first year. I’m finally finding the time and head space to reflect on all the babies year have taught me and the joy they have brought.
What I Wish I Had Known
I was recently talking with some fellow moms about what we wished we had known or done before becoming a mother. So here’s my two cents about the baby years!
This, too, shall pass. Nearly everything in the baby years is short-lived— from the cat naps to the cluster feeding, witching hour, sleep regressions, developmental leaps, teething … all of it is SUCH A BLIP on the radar. But when you’re in it, you think you’ll go mad trying to figure it all out! But now I know there’s no rhyme nor reason to understanding babies. All they need is your presence, your touch, and your love. I would turn back time and RELAX with my first baby.
I was so high-strung about everything, especially her nap schedule. I would go back and tell first-time mom Rebekah to CHILL and just snuggle and play with her if she refused to nap. But I would have also given new mom Rebekah a big hug, an extra cup of coffee, and tell her the loneliness of the newborn years is real and can’t always be erased with baby snuggles. She can treasure it and feel lost in it, too.
Another thing I would have told Rebekah pre baby is to not waste time and energy on curating the perfect list of baby necessities! Babies are small and, again, they don’t need much.
What Surprised Me About the Baby Years
I wasn’t prepared for the ongoing physical changes pregnancy and breastfeeding would bring. I’m still struggling to accept my new body, and I’m getting there slowly but surely. Bigger feet, more grey hairs, extra weight, sagging skin. It’s new territory, but I’m learning to find the beauty in it and to be proud of it. The changing hormones that accompany pregnancy, postpartum and breastfeeding have at times left me in tears I couldn’t explain, wondering if I would ever “return” to my normal self. As it turns out, I’ve never returned to Rebekah pre baby, but I’m discovering the new normal, my new physical, mental and emotional self. It’s an ongoing journey to rediscover myself, this time as a mother. Finally owning the reality I won’t return to my pre baby self granted me freedom to embrace these years and my strength and beauty as a mother.
I also wasn’t prepared for so many sleepless years! I thought I would only lose sleep in. those initial newborn months – once baby was sleeping through the night, I would too. HA HA HA. Not so fast, says pregnancy insomnia. Overall my babies have been good sleepers, but there are so many other factors that can contribute to a night waking, anything from illness to nightmares, separation anxiety, and the list goes on and on. Not to mention, when THEY sleep through the night, I don’t! I’m up thinking of whatever’s next on my to-do list or worrying about them. Motherhood has definitely changed how I sleep.
I’m only six years into my motherhood journey, but I know for certain when it’s all said and done that I’ll look back on the baby years as some of our most tender (and exhausting!) moments and memories together. I realize this season with my babies is a gift, and it’s one I pray every day I never take for granted.
