My 8-year-old daughter, Ava, shared that her friends “got married” on the playground at recess.
She told me she didn’t attend because it was all “too much.”
I had questions. Lots, to be honest.
Namely, how is a second grader getting married before I am?
I’m joking. Kind of.
Seriously, I was most interested in her decision *not* to participate. She shared that she wasn’t cool with the fact that they had to wear regular clothes to a wedding. Like, who does THAT? She also didn’t like that “kids” were getting married. “Like, Mom … they CAN’T do that!”
I mean, I think that’s against the law in most states, right? Wait. Let me Google that to be sure. Because America …
Back to the recess wedding: overall, Ava simply wasn’t feeling it. Her decision and commentary on her reasoning stuck with me.
I was proud that even at her young age, she made the best decision for her. Despite her friend’s feelings, despite all the excitement surrounding the recess wedding, she chose differently.
She chose herself.
It made me think of all the times I made a decision based on someone else’s feelings, neglecting my own. There have been countless times I chose something I didn’t want because my desire to be chosen or accepted was greater than the need to honor myself.
I’m getting better at leaning into what I want and need and letting go of things and people that feel like “too much” or simply not right for me.
I pray that Ava stays fearless in choosing herself again and again as she gets older.
May we all fine-tune our “too much” meters the next time we’re on the fence about what choices we should make when people make us feel icky at work, icky in relationships, icky in friendships, and icky at weddings at recess. Choose wisely.
