I know what it’s like to be lonely. Really, I do. I moved from South Carolina to Missouri not knowing one soul other than my husband and daughter. We found a great church to get plugged into, I joined this fabulous City Moms Blog sister site and I even joined a MOPs (Moms of Preschoolers) group. Yet, some days I still find myself so lonely. This may be the loneliest season of my thirty years.
I talk to my dog and my daughter as if they truly understand me. I go to the library and find myself jealous of the moms standing around with their established friends. I text with other local mamas, and our terrible winter has made it difficult to keep our play date promises. To be honest, I’m friendlier with my grocery delivery drivers than most other people in my life.
So, when I found myself going down a path that reminds me a bit too much of my postpartum depression from just about a year ago, I know I need to reframe my thinking. My therapist would really like that I’m putting her advice to good use. With reframing my thinking comes some action steps that I hope we (both you and me, lonely mama) can put to good use:
- Meet other moms on social media or apps and commit to a play date or mom date (I’ve seen a lot of groups popping up on Facebook lately – so we must not be alone in wanting new friends!).
- Actively pursue other groups that have open play dates or choose an activity that can get you out of the house doing something you find interesting.
- Choose optimism when going into new environments because you never know who you may meet.
Are you past your season of loneliness during motherhood? Here are some ways you can pass it forward:
- Be aware of how your established squad may be perceived by other new moms who desperately need friends. We don’t want to raise mean girls (or boys), so let’s be their examples.
- Invite a mama to join you at your home or a group play date if you happen to see them alone at the same places you frequent.
- Choose to be kind when you see a mama who just can’t seem to find a genuine smile.
Here’s my challenge to you as the seasons change and opportunities arise to get out and do more as the sun begins to shine a bit more: be the sisterhood in the midst of motherhood.
