I’m in a few different local Facebook groups for moms – like I bet most of us are. They’re definitely a great resource, a place where you can go as a mom to ask just about any question. I often see moms asking about different schools/school districts in the area – especially if they are new to STL or moving here – and one important aspect of a potential school or a potential neighborhood for a lot of moms is diversity.
I see moms comment on these posts about certain schools or school districts and boast about how diverse they are, rattling off percentages … but diversity is so much more than numbers. And I often wonder if these moms commenting genuinely believe that a classroom full of 25 kids, when only 2 or 3 aren’t white, can actually count as diverse? If the overwhelming majority of the student population is still white, that doesn’t seem very diverse to me. If the overwhelming majority of a neighborhood is still white, that doesn’t seem very diverse to me. 
This might be obvious but I feel like this still needs to be said – and I am going to steal the words of my friend, Carol – “diversity IS important, but it’s not a box to check. It’s a lifestyle to embrace”.
Because then these same moms post pictures all over their own social media accounts, and I am left wondering where all of that wonderful diversity went that they were talking about …
- Pictures of their kids with their friends – everyone is white
- Pictures of their kids on sports teams – everyone is white
- Even the pictures of the moms with their mom friends – everyone is white
- Pictures of the family at neighborhood and community events – everyone is white
It is not lost on me that I am probably more aware – and sensitive – to a lack of diversity because my own child is NOT white. In her friend group, she’s the only girl who isn’t white. On her sports teams, she’s the only girl who isn’t white. I know this might come off as selfish, but I don’t want my daughter to always grow up being the “token diversity”.
So as we get ready to start a new school year, I am going to challenge STL moms, especially white moms like myself, to not only welcome the potential of diversity in their families’ lives – but to also embrace it, support it, and model it.
Let’s start by taking a moment to take inventory of our own inclusivity. How many people in your life – especially close friends – are of a different race than you? How many are older/younger? How many are disabled? Do you interact with any members of the LGBTQ community? If your answer to a lot of these questions is “no” – realize that your answers actually make sense. People tend to hang out with people who look like them, like the same things as they do, and think about the world in the same way. People who are similar to us make us feel comfortable because familiarity feels “safe”. But remember my challenge? We need to step outside of our comfort zone when working towards our goals of diversity, equity, and inclusion.
Here are some areas to diversify in your daily life:
- Your inner circle and friendships
- The leaders you learn from
- Your place of worship
- Your beauty standards
- The toys you buy your kids
- The books you read
- The books you buy for your kids
- The businesses you patronize
- Your professional network
- Learning a new skill or pursuing a new hobby
And a few more ideas for how you can promote diversity and inclusion in your everyday life:
- Ask questions
- Make connections
- Be an ally
- Reconsider stereotypes
- Consider your actions and reactions
