There are a lot of things about being a mom that I’m good at, but being silly and spontaneous is not one of them. I have a very type A personality. I like to plan and organize and stay on track with the tasks ahead of me. For a while I would watch other mamas being goofy with their kiddos and I would feel that awful mom guilt that I’m somehow not doing it ‘right,’ because being silly is difficult for me. I can somehow equate that with being not good enough or a fun enough mom. In my moments of truth, when I have set aside comparison and all of the “should’s” I am simply able to reply to myself that that idea is false. As moms it is simply impossible for us to be all things, to be good at everything. We all have unique personality traits and characteristics that allow us to be the best possible mamas for our kiddos.
I am great at keeping up with two active little boys. We are constantly running around at the park, going on bike rides, and throwing a football outside. I am great at sitting down and holding a kiddo in my lap when they are struggling with big feelings. I am great at keeping track of numerous schedules and getting kiddos where they need to be. I am great at sitting down at the end of a long day and reading stories to my boys. It is okay that I struggle to be silly. It is okay for you to struggle with something too, in fact it’s okay to struggle with numerous things. We were not created to be all things for our kids, that is why we surround them with friends, family, neighbors, a faith community, teachers, and others that provide our kids with the things that perhaps we aren’t so good at.
All of that to say, I still try and push myself outside of my comfort zone because my boys love when I’m able to set aside my seriousness and do something unexpected. They light up and as their mom I love those moments. So I try in little ways like reading bedtime stories in different voices or starting a spur of the moment Nerf war. While silliness still doesn’t come natural to me, I am beginning to give myself grace in that being good enough.
What aspects of parenthood do you struggle with?
I struggle with the same thing. Cutting loose is hard. I learned that this was an issue for me first as a teacher, so it wasn’t as surprising once I had kids but there are so many moments when you just want to jump in without second-guessing yourself but taking the leap takes so much courage. You are so right, though. Everyone has their strengths and that is enough.
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