Motherhood, they say, is the hardest job in the world. And it’s true. As a mom, you are not only responsible for your child’s physical well-being but also their emotional and mental development. You are their first teacher, their comforter, their guide through life. But who guides you on this journey? Who helps you navigate the challenges and celebrate the victories of motherhood? The answer is simple: a mentor.
I don’t know where I’d be today without the wonderful mentors I gathered around me along the way after first becoming a mom twenty years ago. At the time, I was dating my husband, and overnight, we got full custody of his five kids. I ran to the internet for help and found an amazingly supportive group of misfit second wives and stepmoms who became my instant lifeline. They became my mentors.
All of them had lived a world similar to mine longer than I had, and many also had their own biological children, too. They helped me to see all sides of our blended family, a world I previously knew nothing about. I felt seen and normal, understood and challenged by all of them to be better and do better, while being supported every step of the way.
And yes … I see you too, mom.
You’re the one who juggles a thousand tasks each day, nurturing and guiding little lives while also managing your own. You’re doing an amazing job. But let’s face it, motherhood is no easy task. It’s a journey filled with joy and laughter, but also challenges and uncertainties. And that’s where the magic of mentorship comes in.
You see, as moms, we’re often so focused on being mentors to our children that we forget we need mentors, too. A mentor is someone who’s been where you are – someone who’s navigated the choppy waters of motherhood and emerged stronger. They can provide guidance, encouragement, and a listening ear when you need it most1.
But why is having a mentor so important? Let’s dive into that.
A mentor provides invaluable wisdom and experience. They’ve faced the same sleepless nights, the same toddler tantrums, the same teenage angst. They can offer practical advice and solutions based on their own experiences2. They’ve been there, done that, and lived to tell the tale.
A mentor offers perspective. When you’re knee-deep in diapers or stressing over school grades, it’s easy to lose sight of the bigger picture. A mentor can help you step back, breathe, and remember that this too shall pass3.
AND for those of you balancing motherhood with a career, a mentor can be instrumental in your professional success. Research shows that female mentors have a significant impact on a woman’s ability to succeed, especially for working moms. These mentors can help you navigate the unique challenges of being a working mother, providing guidance and support as you strive to balance your personal and professional life.
But perhaps the most important reason to have a mentor is this: motherhood wasn’t meant to be a solo journey. We’re social creatures, wired for connection and community. Having a mentor means having someone to share the journey with – someone to laugh with, cry with, and learn from6.
So, dear mom, if you don’t already have a mentor, consider seeking one out. Reach out to that wise friend or family member who’s been there before. Seek out resources like St Louis Mom to find a mom to help guide, challenge, and grow alongside you.
I’m still friends with so many of those amazing second wives and stepmoms who came into my life so many years ago. Many of us are grandmothers now and are enjoying watching our now-adult kids thrive while we navigate this new season of our own lives. I can’t imagine how much more bumpy my journey would have been to get here without all of them in my life and I cherish every single nugget of wisdom they have given me along the way.
Remember, as you grow and learn in your motherhood journey, you, too, can become a mentor to others. Share your wisdom, your lessons learned, your victories, and your challenges. Because every mom needs a mentor, and every mom can be one. It has been my honor to be this for so many moms all over the world and it helps me be better every day, too.
Keep shining, keep growing, and remember – you’re doing an amazing job.